DELTA: THE GREYHOUND OF THE SKIES

There are certain companies that have become intertwined with my life. Not Oscar Mayer or Colgate, but companies that have offered products or services that have helped define my identity. The three most immediate that come to mind are Apple Computers, Canon Cameras, and Delta Airlines. I've been using Apple's since I was a freshman in high school. Their advances in creative software on a user friendly platform helped me to evolve as a creative person. The big strike I have against them is their blatant program of planned obsolesce. I'm on my sixth computer, and have bought more software upgrades than I care to recall. Apple was actual sued by Great Britain over planned obsolesce when that country discovered that i-pods click wheels tended to fail shortly after their warranty period had expired.

Canon is a relatively new player in my life, but they are my life, or at least my livelihood. I bought my first Canon for Semster at Sea in 2006. Since then I've owned 7 Canon cameras, 7 Canon lenses, 4 Canon flashes, one Canon battery grip, and one Canon wireless transmitter; roughly an investment of $17,000.00. Canon probably makes the best cameras in the world, but they also have a heavy planned obsolesce agenda. Within one year Canon transitioned through three G series cameras: the G9, G10, and the G11, all replacements for their previous versions. Each camera had some small feature that made upgrading enticing. I owned the G9 and the G10. I drew the line with the G11 (I actually bought a Panasonic GF1 in protest). My first SLR camera was the Canon 40D, which was replaced within 6 months with the Canon 50D, which has now been replaced by the 7D. All of these cameras have special lenses you can buy for their crop-sensors, but those lenses won't work on the more expensive and professional full-frame sensors. If you ever decide to take your photography to the next level, your old lenses will be useless. As technology evolves and full-frame sensors get cheaper, I wouldn't be surprised to see all crop-sensor cameras and lenses go the way of the eight track.

And that brings me to Delta. I grew up in Atlanta, the hub of Delta. I had a dad that traveled for business and always flew Delta. All of our family vacations were flown on Delta. So it made sense that when I grew up I would become a Delta man, which I did. Delta has flown me all over the US and to Europe, Mexico, Thailand and Burma, Cambodia, Peru, and Jordan. I've accumulated hundreds of thousands of miles, and received several free tickets. There is only one problem: Delta sucks! When a mismanaged company becomes intertwined with your life, it's like an abusive spouse whom you have kids with; it becomes hard to pull away. You remember all the good times you had, like that surf and turf dinner in first class on the way to Hawaii when you were ten. You try to look past all the bad things, like trans-continental flights with no movies and no food, or having your award status revoked because you only flew 24,000 miles with the airline in a year, not 25,000. And finally, the biggest offense: the rudest most disgraceful customer service on the planet. I would rather go to the DMV or apply for food stamps than talk with Delta customer service. The final blow that will finally allow me to walk away from this unhealthy marriage came on a recent trip back to Amman from Portland. My girlfriend and I were told we couldn't board our flight unless we purchased over $5000 of return tickets from Amman. We were told by the Delta gate agent that his computer told him that Jordan was not a visa on arrival country, and that if we were denied a visa, we would have to show proof that we could leave. It did not matter to this man that I've lived in Amman for a year and knew this to be false. It did not matter to this man that I've flown into Amman twice before on Delta without a return ticket. So we bought the tickets, flew the Greyhound of the skies (my dad's phrase) and made it to Amman. We got our visas at the airport, never showed our return tickets, and I called Delta to get my tickets refunded. The man on the phone told me that my fully refundable tickets were not refundable because...wait for it...Delta needed to see proof that I was a US citizen before I could cancel my tickets back to the US. Three hours and two supervisors later I think I got my money back, but they have officially lost a loyal customer.