HER STYLIST SHOULD PROBABLY BE KILLED

I've been noticing the billboard at the top of this post all over town. What struck me about it is that the woman featured in the ad really looks like a transvestite. I was all set to do a blog about whether the Chinese are cool with transvestites when I came across another picture of the model, Charmaine Sheh. In this picture she is all woman. Whomever was responsible for her haircut should at the very least be flogged. I've never been more blown away by the difference in two pictures, except maybe by my brief stint in fashion photography.

LURED IN BY A PIZZA CONE

I was in downtown Guangzhou yesterday on my way to a nice sushi lunch when I stumbled upon the restaurant above, poetically called Murmur Shadow. Something about the outer-space lighting theme, the weird communist cat logo, and the mystery of the "pizza cone" lured me in. Well, turns out a pizza cone is really just an oddly rolled hot pocket. I got a sausage and cheese for the bargain price of $1.60. Curiosity makes the cat fat.  

THE LACK OF ARTISTIC EXPRESSION IN CHINA

China is not an easy place to live. Its landscape is a never-ending wasteland of soulless architecture and unfinished projects, all engulfed by a heavy haze of pollution. Finding areas with any sort of character has been difficult. On a recent trip to Shenzhen, we discovered the OCT Loft area of town, with many hip restautaunts, beautiful murals, and a handful of art galleries. I can't tell you how nice it felt being in an area with some soul and integrity. Now we need to find a similar area near our apartment. I'm not sure they exist, but I am positive. 

WINDOW OF THE WORLD SHENZHEN, CHINA

Window of the World is an amusement park situated on 118 acres in Shenzhen, China. The park recreates the most celebrated architecture of our world in miniature fashion. It also has a handful of rides. It is a weird place, though I suppose kind of interesting. Julie and I waited in line for about an hour for a Jacques Cousteau themed ride oddly named "Greenland Underground Exploration". The ride was a fast jolty affair in total darkness. I don't think it did much justice to the famous French explorer.  

WORLD'S CREEPIEST AMUZEMENT PARK

This little amusement park is located inside the estate where I work. It is called "The Farm", I assume because the centerpiece of  the park is a pig, a cow, and a goat, all housed in sad little pens. This park, like a lot of the buildings and spaces around us here in China, is devoid of aesthetics. Broken rides are scattered throughout the park, the grass is overgrown, and trash bins leak liquids and filth onto sidewalks. One roller coster ironically has cars shaped like Mickey Mouse. Walt Disney actually went to great expense to build an entire underground city below Disney World to make the park as aesthetically pleasing as possible and conceal operations that would distract from the beauty of the park. Here, I bet for the right price I could have that pig slaughtered and barbecued on a spit over by the trashcans.      

FUNNY, YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE A YOYO

In a weird turn of events, I was asked to teach one section of third grade in addition to my middle school classes (apparently the teacher left after the first week). I took the class somewhat reluctantly, and was pleasantly surprised that after a week, I kind of enjoyed it. There is something about the energy and disposition of young people that is fun to be around. They really crack me up. One interesting thing is that they all have "English" names. Very few of their names however are actually used in the English speaking world. Some are total nonsense like Yoyo and Handsome. Many are stripper names like Kitty and Vivian. And occasionally they hit the jackpot with the highly coveted "Brian".

FIRST GLIMPSES OF THE "REAL" CHINA

For all intensive purposes, Julie and I are living in a gated country club about 40 minutes south of downtown Guangzhou. I'm not complaining, as life "inside" the gates is safe, aesthetically neutral, and comfortable. The Clifford Estates is a massive planned community with man-made lakes, grocery stores, restaurants, schools, and even a hospital, all located within manicured, secured grounds. It makes adjusting to life in a country so different from the US a bit easier. The one big downside to life in Clifford is that it has no resemblance to the "real"China, where most people struggle to get by. Clifford makes life easier, albeit less interesting. These are a few shots from outside the gates.